Setlist

saw Girl in a Coma at Casbeers. This was the setlist.

i remember you*
clumsy sky
bb
vino
static mind
pleasure & pain
road to home
pink lemonade
their cell
i know it's over*
el monte
in the day
trail
simple man
transmission*

just try to picture it, man...

try to imagine...

if you had never known...

amanda...

jaimi....

valentina.....

[insert the next name here]....

try to imagine that. then you might be in my shoes.





but...
it'll never happen, man.

tour du jour: castroville

It has been a few months now that i have been going into work 6 days a week. I am supposed to be off Sundays and Mondays. Monday is a typically busy day though, and since they're all about numbers at work, well...they figure if they have everyone there they will make their numbers. This means that Sunday is my only full day off. I am not sure what this has to do with anything, except i think it is a factor in why i ride my bike so often.

Lately I have been tired, tired in more than one sense of the word. So I spent this Sunday sleeping up until about 1pm. it felt great until i realized it was a beautiful day out and i was missing it.

Recently, one of the people i follow on twitter.com posted up a trip route to Castroville. He seems to get a lot of good use out of his GPS, and it's one of those things that makes me wonder what the world would be like without Google. This blog wouldn't be here either! Now, I used to live in Castroville, so his post caught my eye. He lives way up on the north part of San Antonio, so to get to Castroville by bike is no small feat. Consider that if he were to drive at 55 or 60 it would probably still take over an hour. I am not sure what speed he averages on bike, but I probably do 12-15 at best.

It has been some time since i lived in Castroville, but my p.o. box is still out there. When i worked out there it was much easier to check it at least once a week, but i haven't worked out there in about 2 years and these days its more likely that 2 weeks or more go by without checking it. So, let's just say that when i saw his post about pedaling to Castroville, i was inspired to try. It is not that far for me. I am not sure why i was thinking it was 20 miles, but it turned out to be 27.2 miles (43.77 km)from my house to the post office round trip.

That probably doesn't sound like a lot of mileage, but there are quite a few uphills. Actually, i would say the first 7 miles or so is largely uphill. Even when you're not on an actual hill, there is an incline. With all the pedaling I do in this hill country, I'd like to think I can handle the hills now. What really sucked was riding against the wind. It was a very windy day. I made it though, and i look forward to the next time.

Well, it is 3 in the morning and i have to be at work at 8. so i leave you with these pictures from my cell. Next time i will take my real camera. Click to enlarge!

a watcher's point of view

i could not help it tonight. i sat there watching on autopilot, wondering what the fuck could have happened. i came upon one special time...one i clearly remember on my own. i know my memory is fucked, but some things...some things don't erase just like that.

i was only trying to be nice...in my mind i was only being nice. that's what happens though. nice people get stepped on. nice people get pushed aside. you gotta be an asshole...or else. it ain't fair and it don't make sense, but i've seen it time and again.

i laid there freezing my tail and feeling i was doing right. i took a snapshot of the moment. a moment of peace, harmony, buzz and brrr.

but...

i should've been an ass. nice ain't a good thing in practice. true story.

the file may be truncated or incomplete. continue?

desperte en la madrugada sintiendo que el corazon estallaba. cerre los ojos. respire profundo. me dormi nuevamente.

today was a nice day. recently i purchased a stylus for my record player. the one i purchased it with was damaged. unfortunately i was not around to realize it and so i'm certain some records are damaged from playing back with a damaged stylus. no matter. i did a little research and found a suitable upgrade (Stanton D6800EEE MKIII), and i am loving it!

today i spent a few hours listening to some records. some old, some new and all of them sounding great. maybe i am exaggerating. maybe my ears are not that great and my brain just interprets it as sounding great. to me it was worth it to purchase a genuine replacement part at 3 or 4 times the cost of one that just works. why? tonight i heard a subtle gasping. tonight that guitar and high hat felt like they were right there. tonight i wish it was tomorrow, so i could go hunt for something else to listen with the volume set at my age.

i know the world has moved on to cd and mp3. i know there have been a gazillion improvements in turntables since 1979. tonights discovery of something new in the old...well, it's the first hint of being happy in a while. now i just need to switch up the tunes a little!

tour du jour : la cantera

i was so very hungry. i hadn't eaten anything all day, and it was already almost 2pm. i sent a friend a text wondering if there were good places to eat near here. she works here, i'm sure she'd know. i promptly got 2 suggestions. thanks.

it was a lovely uphill. the sidewalk has a cobblestone feel to it, which i don't like too much, but it does have a nice zig zag to it. i climbed up that hill like it was nothing. i was a little disappointed at the sidewalk ending out of nowhere...into nowhere. welcome to san antonio. i was grateful for gears.

suddenly i was back at my old university. things have changed since i've been. i guess that's partially why it costs more now? i want to go back. i want to learn or something. i want to hang out with smart people. i want to pedal with people barely starting...smoke them with my ultra heavy bike.

the movies were pretty much free. i got a gift cheque out of nowhere and i used it on a dreamland in imax 3d.

German steel

there are many reasons why i ride. today i brainstormed the main reason...and well, that will be another time. lately the most prominent reason is that stopping might kill me. gotta just keep going...gotta keep going.

tomorrow, with luck, i will wake up early enough to deliver tacos by bike to some of my coworkers. i thought i was feeling inspired enough tonight, but it appears it would be best to just bid everyone a good night.

my own fault

it is my own doing, really. if i had followed my own advice, i would probably not feel this way now. i told myself i should not dream such things. i told myself i would not dream such things. i am not sure when the dreaming took over. i thought for once...and there the mistake.

i guess you really should be careful what you ask for. "pinch me, i'm dreaming", i asked. yep, i was dreaming. such a nice dream. so believable that it hurts to realize it was just a dream. in reality, there is no such friend. not for me, anyway.

i really wish i had been more prepared for the post-pinch.

2 a.m. again

tonight was just one of those nights, i guess. it's slightly comforting to know the stars are misaligned for other folks too. a little creepy that it all happens on the same day, but then again there is my favourite fortune reminding me that there are coincidences. i am sorry, my friend, that i could not give you better advice. you see, if the question is sink or swim, well...i will sink. anyway, i hope my advice doesn't screw things up more for you. 2 a.m. approaches. i work tomorrow and then there's a ride. i will brave the cold because i can. i will brave the cold because there is nothing better to do. i will pedal on because...i have to.

the death of archibald q.

it was pointless to have it around anymore...

there was only 1 person i ever really cared for on there: the first add. everyone else...all 22 of them...well, they wanted to consider themselves my friend, so i said ok.


it does hurt a bit to lose those random moments of "hey i was thinking about you enough to leave this comment"...but i guess it just felt like it hurt more to keep around these reminders if in the end they mean nothing.

i sat there thinking...

how the hell did it get to be 2am already?
failed missions
chores undone
stomach grumbling

i sat there eating stale oatmeal squares and not-so-fresh orange juice from concentrate. i had to eat something, i suppose. nothing good is open at 2:15, so stale cereal and strange tasting oj worked.

tonight i feel insulted. that's not an easy thing to do.

tonight i feel curious. do other people see it that way?

tonight...

nevermind, i'm going to sleep.