in da club

how the hell did i end up here again? i spent 5 minutes and a dollar on touchtunes, and still no answer. i remember. it was years ago, but i still recall the last time. i'd put in five dollars, picked out all the cool versions of the songs she loved, and it only got me ridiculed. well this time...this time would be different. i picked 1 song. a song for me. a song for us. would she know it?

i returned to the table for my free drink. i must've had some kinda look on my face, some kinda HELP ME coming out of my eyes. my drunken friend asked me how he could help. he said, "tell me what you're looking for...what are you looking for?". I did not answer him.

to be honest, i simply didn't have an answer. i know i am attracted to long, brown hair (curly or straight), but hair does not make the woman. neither does "beauty". i write this now and i still don't really know what i'm typing. maybe i just don't want to type it. it's better off as an ever-changing idea, not something to be stripped out of context and place on a magnet cause it sounds kinda cute.

i thought of my friend when i caught up with her a few nights later. i could've pointed then, even if pointing is the rude thing to do. but hey, if it is too good to be true, then it likely is. pretty, smart, and on a bicycle?! it was too good to be true and i knew not to even try. maybe my 6th sense already knew she was taken. (she was.)

i guess i am a little more hopeful that whatever i'm looking for exists though. probably not though. probably not.